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I am
interested in a complex set of relationships within the
subject that influence and order subjective experience.
The “subject” is more often implicated by its actions,
drives, and desires, rather than experienced as a
distinct and separate entity. My paintings offer an
arena for my actions, drives and desires to display
themselves. The paintings record every gesture without
judgment. The transience of a gesture is held and made
visible. I betray myself or “self” both consciously and
unconsciously through the movements of my body. The
paint remains as a memory, a fixed point of reference to
a body’s presence, time spent, a momentary act of
reflection or a “state of consciousness.”
What we abstract from subjective experience at any
moment is merely a fragmentary oscillation. I have
ordered my working methodologies to account for and make
apparent features and relationships within these
movements. There are periods in my work when I immerse
myself in sensuous unmediated movements of perception in
order to experience direct sensation. There are other
movements when I fully embrace the preconscious
structures of language and the social other.
I often utilize both methods of working within the same
picture plane. I use these methods at different stages
of a work. By brining together both methods, I establish
a relationship between mediated and unmediated ways of
working. Because these processes flow directly out of
psychic states, it is implicit that on some level I am
visually representing a relationship between these
states. I often directly respond to marks made from
previous states. I move back and forth between methods
of working, leaving a build-up of residue on the
surface. Whether the relationship that results is
visually apparent or completely buried under a history
of painted movements, a differential relationship has
occurred and continues to occur within the work. Through
careful inquiry and observation, I become aware of the
implications of my paintings. Through fluid sets of
unexpected associations I gain awareness of myself and
the structures that influence and organize my
experience. |
